Monday, December 21, 2020

Die Hard is a Christmas movie

Die Hard is a Christmas movie. It came out in summer, but it's set the night before Christmas, hence it's a Christmas movie. Even director John McTiernan agrees.

To be honest, I was aware of this debate, and I probably heard one or two songs mentioning Die Hard, bad guy Hans Gruber (played by Alan Rickman in the first DH-movie) or John McClane (Bruce Willis, duh), what I was NOT aware of, is that 'Die Hard is a Christmas Movie' is a whole subgenre in Christmas music. Thanks to Jim/CU and Santapalooza tweeting about this (HERE), I dove in and dug up over 25 songs either about the (first) movie, the protagonist and his antogonist. I know there's more. If I missed a really good one, please link in the comments. A Spotify playlist with almost all songs HERE.

Athens-singer Four Eyes wrote, without a doubt, the greatest song about bad guy Hans Gruber, and Christmas, ever. 'Yes, everything will change this Christmas/Whether you are falling in love or falling from a tower'
VERY charming song about McClane, saviour of Christmas:

UK's Jonnie Common wrote a downtempo, understated but really, REALLY great song about the first Die Hard movie (posted here before). Chorus goes: 'I make fists (fists)/fists with my toes' (more HERE):
Sounds like a demo of a really good ballad (dunno 'bout the rapping tho):
From a guy (who also calls himself Nick SantaCroce) who made A LOT of Christmas songs, this spiced up (with bullets) Die Hard re-telling:
Comedian Marian Call made, I think, the best nerdy Die Hard-tributing Christmas song, a great singalong (posted here in 2014):
There's a lot going on in this Insane Ian & Bonecage song. It's both a tribute to Alan Rickman, to David Bowie & Bing Crosby and to Die Hard. Set to the music of Little Drummer Boy. And yes it's super cool:
From last year, a full album to prove that Die Hard is a Christmas film by UK comedian David Goody. It's like War of the Worlds, but then about Die Hard. Best title: 'But Hans, it's cold outside':
The whole first Die Hard movie as told in about 4 minutes, set to lo-fi punk, totally great: 'Enter officer al Powell/Screaming for backup welcome to the party pal'
Same idea, slightly better recording equipment:
The movie told on a ska-punk beat, with bells (acoustic version? HERE):
...but in Spanish:
...but in Hungarian (one of the lines goes, translated: 'Barefoot/only barefoot/make a fist out of your foot'). Very good rock song this:
HARRRRDCORE, including a sample, and yes, it's the story of the movie told in the screamo-lyrics, even the holidays are mentioned. Not for everybody, I like it
The Ballad of Hans Gruber, as a pirate's hymn:
Great idea, become the partner of John McClane in a song (in a dreamstate):
Slight detour, but a great upbeat miserable Christmas song I'd never heard before by a UK band called Piskie Sits with nods to Die Hard, Home Alone and Elf:
Die Hard, punkpop style:
Die Hard, emopop style:
From the cartoon series 'Family Guy', first two verses of Jingle Bells 'nobody knows' and then a song about Die Hard, by the Adam West High School Choir:

Oh, you wanted hiphop? Swiss-language hiphop? Yippeee ka yay du Schweinebacke!
OK, I only chose this because 'Nakatomi, Nakatoyou' is so stupid it's actually funny. So is Hams Gruber. It's a loud hardcore song, can't figure out if the lyrics (if it's actually lyrics) are about the movie:
LOUD ode to McClane, who apparently 'doesn't take shit from a n y b o d y'
From a pretty explicit Xmas album, this UK metalband: Hans Gruber Brass Band, from a series of Canadian compilations I'll have to explore more (the HGBB also covered a Hannukah-song):

From 2022: STILL arguing if it's a Christmas movie or not:
From 2012: Bluesey ode to Die Hard, the only film this guy wants to see on Christmas Eve:
A very good, hard-hitting power pop track where Xmas movie heroes Bruce Willis & Macaulay Culkin go head to head:
Is there more? Of course there's more. There's a band called Hans Gruber & the Die Hards who (as fas as I can tell, correct me) never made a song about the movie, or Hans. There's this defunct mathrock band who wrote a song called 'The Fall of Hans Gruber' that (again, as fas as I can tell) isn't really about Hans. This metalband is called 'Dance Gruber' and release albums (none about the movie, or Hans) called 'DIY Hard'. 'Poor quality bloke-core' about John HERE. Scottish punk about John McC, with easy to remember lyrics. A Spanish song about John McClane's feet, HERE. More on the shoes vs John McClane theme, HERE. This Australian folkster can't really sing, but his song needs to be in this list. And this Stony Girl song, I'll Die Hard This Christmas, is the perfect ending:


Stubby said...

I remember the days when I, too, had too much free time on my hands. LOL. Very entertaining post, Guuz. Merry Christmas, Hans Gruber, wherever you are.

Richard said...

If "Die Hard" is a Christmas movie, *then so is every other movie set around Christmas*.

Like "The Thin Man" (1934).

And when it comes to Die Hard and music, how can one forget "Work Hard or Die Trying, Girl"?

Guuzbourg said...

@Richard, thanks. Nothing can top that Bob's Burgers scene.

raizin said...

Were you aware of this lovely ballad by eagleowl - Let's Save Christmas (The Ballad of Nakatomi Plaza)?

Guuzbourg said...

Yes! It is in the list. I posted the Jonnie Common song video and a link to the eagleowl Bandcamp